My Laziest Sex Positions feat. Phoenix Payn

2 lovers lie side-by-side in a 69 position for oral sex

We all might love to sing along to the songs that suggest riding on dong is all we like to do, and that we’re better at it than anyone else. But even the most experienced cowpoke gets sore thighs. Sometimes you get off the train from work and there’s a good dick/dildo waiting at home, but you’re just done with riding anything for the day. It’s okay, pard’ner. I’ve got you.

Here to help me demonstrate these positions (and get some dick) is local sexpot Phoenix Payn, a good friend of mine and a dedicated slutty bottom! Though we’ll be demonstrating these positions as two performers with vulvas, any of these positions can be adapted for your corresponding genitalia/relationship dynamic. For the positions that may include penetration, I will be the one wearing the harness.

Phoenix Payn, a petite model with long brown hair, poses with legs crossed, in an all-pink outfit that features a stocking cap that says, "Can we smoke weed in here?"
The lovely Phoenix, my longtime friend and favorite fuckbuddy!

Here are five ideas for sex positions that can help you get it on without getting exhausted!

Spooning to Fork

I don’t doubt you know this position, because it’s just so easy. I just wanted to remind you that it exists, it fucking rocks, and tell you about my favorite ways to get it done. This is a classic spooning position, with the penetrating partner in the position of “big spoon,” with their face to the back of the receiving partner in the “little spoon” position, being held from behind in a lying down position. The idea here is penetration from behind, with both parties lying down facing the same direction.

A petite model and a plus-sized model wearing a strap-on harness demonstrate a spooning position for the purpose of penetrative sex.
I think we’ve all gotten lazy and tried this position at least once. Then we probably came back for more, because’ it’s great!

This is going to go a whole lot more smoothly if the receiving partner lifts/receives assistance lifting their top leg (whichever one is closer to the ceiling and not on the bed) while initial penetration occurs. If you’re able, you’re welcome to keep your leg in the air, but it’s a little exhausting and the goal here is LAZY sex! Besides, there are benefits to the laziness: once you close your legs with your partner inside you, there’s an undeniable squeeze that your penetrating partner will love. If you can’t lift your leg or this method doesn’t work for you, try this variation to start off: the little spoon can bend/receive assistance to bend 90 degrees at the waist. This will shift the pelvis and make it easier to get inside. Once connected, the receiving partner can straighten up again to bring the intimacy of the position back into play.

A petite model and a plus-sized model wearing a harness demonstrate a variation of a spooning position for penetrative sex, where the receiving partner bends at the waist.
Have the receiving partner bend at the waist for a more optimal angle that will make penetration from behind easier.

This position puts a lot of the movement responsibility on the penetrating party, though. If the receiving partner wants to absorb a little of that work, grabbing onto the side of the bed to stabilize the body against their partner’s thrusts will make this position easier on them. And, as with most sexual experiences, you can make everything easier and more fun by adding a little extra lube to the party!

A Side of 69

2 lovers lie side-by-side in a 69 position for oral sex
Everyone gets to lie down in this XXXtra relaxing position!

Much like the previous position, this is a position that will have both partners lying on their sides. But in this variation, they face one another and are flipped head-to-toe so that each partner’s mouth has access to the other’s genitals. If you’re finding this causes unwanted neck strain, you can optimize this position by placing a pillow beneath hips, or under heads. 

Mutual Masturbation

Yes, this counts as sex! Anything that builds physical intimacy with your partner, and that you personally feel is sex, is sex. So maybe you want to get it on without anyone getting on top, or someone is on their period, or someone’s got an OB. There’s lots of reasons to enjoy what some affectionately call “outercourse.” I’m talking about this not-last on purpose, because it’s not a cop-out! You’re not playing baseball! You are experiencing and building intimacy with another person, so please abandon the base-running metaphors.

A petite model and a plus-sized model lie on their backs, with legs intertwined so their pelvises align. Both are using a Satisfyer sex toy as they gaze into each others' eyes.
The fact that we both own a Satisfyer Pro 2 should tell you how good this toy is at giving orgasms.

The benefits are so plentiful, where do I begin? Everyone gets to be in exactly the position that works for them. If one partner just got home from a job where they spend hours on their feet and their hip is sore, they can choose a supine (belly-up) position. If your favorite way to be seen fucking is from behind, you can choose an especially raunchy bent-over pose to show off your self-pleasuring skills to your partner. There is absolutely no pressure, because you’re working with the body you’re (probably) most familiar with bringing to orgasm. Perhaps, by watching, you learn something new about the way your partner likes to be stimulated, or they realize for the first time that hey, there’s something you like to do to yourself that they would like to try doing to you!

Finally, perhaps the most responsible reason mutual masturbation fucking slaps is that it carries the most minimal risk of STI’s. I will not betray facts established by medical science and say that the risk is as minimal as abstinence (I don’t know how close you’re sitting to your sex partner! I don’t know if you end up touching each other with the same hands you’ve touched yourselves with! I’m not hangin’ out in your bedroom watching you, even though that would be kinda fun!) but you are on my blog reading about sex positions, so I doubt that’s the advice you’re looking for, which is ideal, because that’s not the kind of the advice I give! 

It’s a Vibe, yah yah

In one of the most comfortable and accessible positions on my list, both partners lie on their backs with their legs interlocking so that the genital areas of both partners meet, and the negative space between them is filled by a vibrator or other toy. A plug-in wand of your preferred variety is recommended for power and equal distribution of sensation for you both, but you could fill that naughty space between you with anything that fits and will stimulate the bits. 

A petite model and a plus-sized model lie on their backs with their pelvises aligned for tribadism, and a magic wand vibrator fills the space between them, stimulating both their clits.
Plenty of opportunity to grind against your partner by pulling them closer if you grab their legs 😉

There are plenty of variations on this, the most intimate being another side-lying position wherein you and your partner are facing each other with legs intertwined and the vibrator fills the space you find there. Roll around on the bed a bit with it between you and see what you can find that takes you both all the way home. 

If possible, a mirror added to the ceiling above two lovers in this position (or maybe you can just find a a hotel with this feature!) can greatly enhance the visual experience for both parties.

SAFETY NOTE: if you are using a plug-in wand, be mindful of your positioning and the pressure applied to the vibrator, or you could end up like that video I saw in 2014 of the webcam girls grinding with a Magic Wand between them when it broke and started SHOOTING SPARKS. I cannot find this video. Believe me, I tried. To avoid this, maintain positions between you and your partner that don’t put the pressure of your body weight on the wand! This is why I suggest you both lying on your backs, or on your sides face-to-face. If you get really into this position, the temptation to get on top and grind could be irresistible, but I’m certain you’d rather have a hot and sexy time than a hot and fiery and awkward-conversations-with-your-neighbors-while-the-fire-chief-judges-you time. 

Lead Me To The Cross

(That one’s for the other bitter former-evangelical freaks reading my blog.)

A petite model and a plus-sized model wearing a strap-on harness lie perpendicular to one another, hands clasped. The harness is aligned to penetrate the petite model, who rests their legs across the plus-sized model's body.
Make a cross with your bodies… just don’t do anything holy while you do.

So simple, you’ll be shocked you didn’t think of it, or perhaps you forgot it. This is a penetrative position with the receiving party lying on the back with their knees bent, and the person who described this position to me said, “(the receiving partner) makes a tent with their legs for (the giving partner)” and I thought that was so cute. The person doing the penetrating should lie on their side, perpendicular to their partner, and penetrate from there.

Sexy Fact:

While we were shooting the nude version of this position with actual fucking (which you can see by subscribing to my OnlyFans!) Phoenix let out the cutest little whimper and said, “Okay, that’s about enough, I can’t finish (yet),” and honestly? I was only about 7 strokes in.

Whether that’s about the “Cross” position, or my incredible ability to throw dick, or Phoenix being a naughty little slut who loves to take pipe, I can’t really say. All I know is that I had a lot of control of depth of penetration, it didn’t take much work to do, and there’s also a very creamy picture of Phoenix that I took right after we were done shooting this position! You can find that shot on Phoenix’s OnlyFans exclusively!

Y Muchos Mas

Obviously this brief article does not contain the full library of sex positions you can enjoy without breaking a sweat. I’ve selected a few of my tried-and-true favorites to tell you about/remind you are possible. Do you have a favorite you want to share with me and my many tens of readers? (Honestly… that’s an ambitious figure.) Leave me a comment and tell me all about it. Reading and reporting these is hot as hell.

Til next time, happy loving!

xo, Kay

A petite model and a plus-sized model wearing a strap-on harness with a dildo attached lie perpendicular to one another, demonstrating a penetrative sex position where the receiving partner's legs rest on the giver's body. A realistic dong can be seen between the petite model's legs.
Nice job reading to the end. Here’s one of the pics where my dick is showing! You’re welcome!

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